Moving usually means saying goodbye. People, places, routines---there are things that must be left behind. But moving also involves a valiant attempt to transplant one's sense of home. In the West, we do this through stuff. We pack our mementos, our favorite towels, our important documents, and our stuffed animals into banana boxes and set forth to set up "home" in another place. Once this stuff is unpacked and set up in the new dwelling, we have taken our first steps to feeling less displaced.
So I am in a dilemma. I have a decorated, homey apartment full of five years of stuff. But I am not sure what to do with it, because after this move comes a year of limbo-transition. I plan to come back to the US for at least a year, dividing my time between my scattered family members who I miss so much. But I might come back to China after that and set up life in a new city. Then again, things might fall into place in another way and I might settle somewhere in the States for awhile. So, now it is a question of stuff.
Should I pack up everything and ship "life in China" stuff to a storage unit in Beijing, hedging my bets that I will come back? Should I only take three suitcases worth of my most precious mementos and my essential books and give everything else away? Should I ship a few things to Beijing, take the essentials, and leave the rest? Should I keep my matching coffee mugs, my cookie pans, and my glass pie dishes? Should I bring my favorite tea set back to the States so it can sit in a box in my Mom's garage, or should I consign it to a storage unit in Beijing, China? I didn't anticipate this part of the move being so complicated. I tried to go through my books this weekend, but realized that the size of the giveaway pile all depends on my final decision of what I will do with "the stuff."
Goodness, now I need some coffee.
I understand your dilemma. Been there...though not as "deep". :) If you 'plan' to come back, keep the household stuff you'd use again, especially those more difficult to replace in China, like a pie pan. Can someone use stuff while you are gone...even some Chinese friends? Even if you don't need this stuff and you store it (don't return) it's stuff you can easily part with later...stuff another American would appreciate having.
ReplyDeleteOh, and then the books. I hate to even go there! Is there a 'team library' you can leave them...some...in?
Maybe take some precious mementos 'home' now...some of that fun paper and photo stuff! Give away some clothes you don't wear much anymore.
There will always be some "I wish I woulda done X instead of Y" but you'll survive. In the long run the relationships are the most important. I'm sure some of your students, teachers, even that nice lady you buy eggs from would appreciate some of your cool stuff as reminders of YOU. Ah, and all that takes time as well...jeepers.
If you want to toss some ideas/thoughts/opinions my way, please do so by email. XO
Love you, Amy! And I can't wait to come bother you this next year in CO! :-)
ReplyDeleteI hope it was aa good cup of coffee. Sometimes when it comes to decisions like this, a cup of coffee is the first best decision you will make.
ReplyDeleteJust thinking off the top of my head, this is what comes to mind. Put all the house-stuff (mugs, pans, dishes in storage in China. That stuff does have value to you but you don't have to have it with you in the states. Perhaps it would cost you as much money to ship it as it would to buy that stuff again. Like you said, you don't know what your year will look like exactly, so, sometimes the less stuff you have, the simpler it makes things.
I imagine your family taking extra good care of you while you are back . . . you may not need a lot of stuff. If it's not too big, maybe bring your favorite tea set home with you. Then you can enjoy it with the ones you love and maybe leave it at your mom's if you have to. I find that it's hard to decide what to do with books!
If you come back to China you have that kitchen/house stuff waiting for you. If you don't, it's not the big loss (hopefully) and maybe you can have a friend or student get it out of storage for their own use ???
I know you will you find just the right place and solution for all this stuff. Our Father cares about even the details. May He guide you even in these ways.
Sendin you love!